James Hannah

So: you were ask­ing what I know about the car­a­van. Well, here’s a descrip­tion lifted from some promo mate­r­ial, to whet your appetite: Called ‘Princess Nova’ the car­a­van was exten­sively ren­o­vated before being dec­o­rated with vin­tage wall­pa­per and yel­low paint for the pan­elling. A mini bar has been added along­side upgraded cook­ing facil­i­ties and a dou­ble bed. White Stuff toured …

I have just won a car­a­van. Not just any car­a­van, but Jols and my ‘win­ning’ song has bagged a Princess Nova that has been pimped, with retro wall­pa­per on the out­side, and a mini-bar and a chem­i­cal toi­let. I know what you’re think­ing: ‘But you hate car­a­vans’. Mm. So what this leaves is a series of ques­tions to which I don’t …